St. Peter was at the pearly gates, making his usual list of names of people waiting to get into heaven. The first man walked up and Peter asked, “Who are you?” “It’s me, Albert Jones,” the voice replied. St. Peter took his name and let him in. St. Peter asked the second one the second… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
Tag: Jokes
The Fabulous Friday Funnies – Christmas Special
“I read this in the wall street journal today: The new trend in Christmas cards this year are ‘DVD cards’ – instead of a letter about your family and what you did this year, you put your yearly memories on a DVD which I really enjoy getting, you know why? They make great coasters.” –Jay… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies – Christmas Special
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
A classic Christmas joke…. A few years ago it was a bad xmas for santa. Mrs Claus had left with a troll with a big xmas stocking, the toy making elves were on strike because the IR director had tried to put them on individual contracts, the sleigh needed new runners, the reindeers were hung… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
SOBER: The condition in which it is almost impossible to fall in love. A wife, one evening, drew her husband’s attention to the couple next door and said, “Do you see that couple? How devoted they are? He kisses her every time they meet. Why don’t you do that?” “I don’t know her well enough.”… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
A man goes to the doctor and tells him that he hasn’t been feeling well. The doctor examines him, leaves the room and comes back with three different bottles of pills. The doctor says, “Take the green pill with a big glass of water when you get up. Take the blue pill with a big… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
Three old ladies were sitting side by side in their retirement home reminiscing. The first lady recalled shopping at the green grocers and demonstrated with her hands, the length and thickness of a cucumber she once could buy for a penny. The second old lady nodded, adding that onions used to be much bigger and… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The woman knelt in the confessional and said, “Bless me, father, for I have sinned.” “What is it, child?” “Father, I have committed the sin of vanity. Twice a day I gaze at myself in the mirror and tell myself how beautiful I am.” The priest turned, took a good look at her and said,… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
A guy shows up late for work. The boss yells, “You should have been here at 8:30!” He replies, “Why? What happened at 8:30?” I tried exercise as a means of burning fat, but it didn’t work for me. When the fat started burning, it smelled like bacon and made me hungry. —Planojo “In politics… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
Seen on condom machine in England: “Manufactured to strict British standards.”Underneath, someone had scratched, “So was the Titanic.” Some bad Halloween riddles Q. What do you get if you cross a ghost and Bambi? A. Bamboo Q. What do you call a witch that loves the beach? A. A sand witch Q. What do you… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
Q: If you want to weigh a whale where would you take it. A: To a whale weigh station. Bella was terribly upset. Her fiance, Marvin, had been to a clinical psychologist, and the results were not entirely consoling. She said to her mother, “I’m not sure the marriage would be happy, Ma. The psychologist… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies