It was the day after Christmas. The lawyer had gone out for the day, so the burglar, noticing this, broke into his house and stole all his Christmas gifts. He was almost out of the house when a police officer pulled up to the house and promptly apprehended the man. "You can’t arrest me!" the… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
One of the most successful inventors of all time was the man who invented the hay-bailing machine. Needless to say, he made a bundle. My wife and I are inseparable. In fact, last night it took four policemen and a dog.
A guy is walking down the street with a case of beer under his arm. His friend stops him and asks, "Hey! Whatcha got that case of beer for?" "Well, I got it for my wife, you see?" the guys answers. "Wow," exclaims his friend, "Great trade.
Movie Quotes – The First Drafts The Godfather"I’m gonna make him an offer he can’t refuse. Well, he can refuse it, of course. I just know that if someone were to make me an offer like this, I’d jump all over it. But who am I to impose my feelings on someone else?" The Terminator"I’ll… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
Finding a woman sobbing that she had locked her keys in her car, a passing soldier assures her that he can help. She looks on amazed as he removes his trousers, rolls them into a tight ball and rubs them against the car door. Magically it opens. "That’s so clever," the woman gasps. "How did… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
"Crouching Tiger, hidden hydrant" What’s the difference between a car and a golf ball? Tiger can drive a ball 400 yards. What does Tiger Woods have in common with baby seals? They both get clubbed by Norwegians. That’s the first time Tiger Woods has failed to drive 300 yards Tiger Woods crashed into a fire… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
A man entered the bus with both of his front pockets full of golf balls and sat down next to a beautiful (you guessedit) blonde. The puzzled blonde kept looking at him and his bulging pockets. Finally, after many such glances from her, he said, ‘Its golf balls’. Nevertheless, the blonde continued to look at… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
These two girlfriends are very close, allowing them to be totally honest with each other. As one fidgeted in front of the mirror one evening before a date, she remarked, "I’m fat." "No, you’re not," the other scolded. "My hair is awful." "It looks just fine." "I’ve never looked worse," she whined. "Yes, you have,"… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
A primary school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past.Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children fell to debating the dog’s duties. “They use him to keep crowds back,” said one youngster. “No,”said another, “he’s just… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
A guy sees a beautiful, young woman at the other end of the bar. He walks up to her and says, "Where have you been all my life?" "Well," she says looking him up and down, "for the first half of it, I wasn’t even born." A friend’s young daughter heard a riddle in kindergarten… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies