The Fabulous Friday Funnies

A primary school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past.Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children fell to debating the dog’s duties. “They use him to keep crowds back,” said one youngster. “No,”said another, “he’s just… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies

The Fabulous Friday Funnies

A Wee Scottish Tale. A man is cupping his hand to scoop water from a Highland burn. A Gamekeeper shouts: ‘Dinnae drink tha waater! Et’s foo ae coo’s shite an pish!’ The man replies: ‘My Good fellow, I’m from England. Could you repeat that in English for me?’ The keeper replies: ‘I said, use two… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies

The Fabulous Friday Funnies

Everyone has a right to make money. A sign posted at a local pub reads "Be safe: Don’t drink and drive. But please still drink." When a lonely frog consults a fortune-teller, he’s told not to worry. "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl,"she says, "and she will want to know everything about… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies

Little Johnny Jokes

Little Johnny’s at it again….. A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, ‘Everyone who thinks they’re stupid, stand up!’ After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up. The teacher said, ‘Do you think you’re stupid, Little Johnny?’ ‘No, ma’am, but I hate to see… Continue reading Little Johnny Jokes

The Fabulous Friday Funnies

On a lonely, moonlit country road a young man’s car engine started to cough. Immediately pulling over to a scenic little spot he said to the young lady next to him, “That’s funny, I wonder what that knocking noise was?” “I’ll tell you one thing for sure,” said the girl coolly, “It wasn’t opportunity.” A… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies

Fabulous Friday Funnies – Easter Double Up (Part Two)

"You’d be surprised how much it costs to look this cheap." —Dolly Parton When I was in an antique shop in a Victorian country town recently I saw this sign…. “Any unsupervised children will be given unlimited red cordial and told they can take a cute puppy home.” "According to Glamour magazine, 83 percent of… Continue reading Fabulous Friday Funnies – Easter Double Up (Part Two)

The Fabulous Friday Funnies

“The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can’t improve your lie.” —George Deukmejian TODAY’S STOCK MARKET RESULTS They are as follows. . . Helium was up, feathers were down. Paper was stationery. Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading. Knives were up sharply. Cows steered into a bull market. Pencils lost… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies