The Fabulous Friday Funnies

“The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can’t improve your lie.” —George Deukmejian TODAY’S STOCK MARKET RESULTS They are as follows. . . Helium was up, feathers were down. Paper was stationery. Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading. Knives were up sharply. Cows steered into a bull market. Pencils lost… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies

The Fabulous Friday Funnies

A blind man was describing his favorite sport, parachuting. When asked how this was accomplished, he said that things were all done for him: “I am placed in the door and told when to jump. My hand is placed on my release ring for me, and out I go.” “But how do you know when… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies

The Fabulous Friday Funnies

“The next great civilization to arise was Ancient Greece, which came up with an exciting new governing concept called “democracy,” from the Greek words dem, meaning “everybody gets to vote,” and ocracy, meaning “except, of course women, slaves and poor people.” -Dave Barry Spanish singer Julio Iglesias was on television with British TV host Anne… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies

The Fabulous Friday Funnies

Q. What do you call a blonde with a map, compass, and set of directions? A. Lost. A golfer stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity. Looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed–driving his partner nuts. Finally his exasperated partner says, “What’s taking so long? Hit… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies

The Fabulous Friday Funnies

I had forgotten to get my estrogen patch prescription re- filled, and soon the symptoms of menopause–hot flashes, forgetfulness and irritability returned. At the pharmacy, I found myself telling the pharmacist all about my problems. After listening patiently, he asked, “Just out of interest, how many people asked you to get this refilled? “There are… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies

The Fabulous Friday Funnies are back for 2008!

True story… I was just reading the local paper. The article I was looking at was titled “Unwanted dogs dumped”. It was written by David Catt! A lady is having a bad day at the roulette tables in Vegas. She’s down to her last $50. Exasperated, she exclaims, “What rotten luck I’ve had today! What… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies are back for 2008!

The Fabulous Friday Funnies

Stress Buster No. 39 Energise with achievements. As the year draws to a close, make time to reflect on all you’ve achieved this year personally and as a family. Make a list to share, discuss and celebrate. On a queue in a bookshop yesterday, Patricia decided to have a bit of a grumble with the… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies