Swine flu, however, is not a problem for the pigs because they’re all going to be cured anyway. News Flash …. this just in. The world’s religious leaders have issued a joint declaration that the Swine Flu pandemic is the start of the aporkalypse. Swine flu has now mixed with bird flu. Scientists say they… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
Category: Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
A hallway in my house needed more light so I decided to install one of those lights activated by movement. So off I went to the lighting shop and told the helpful assistant that I needed ‘a motion detector for my back passage’. There was a pause and then she cracked up. A Zen master… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told a worried operator: ‘I haven’t got a pen, so I’m steaming up the window to write the number on’. Tech Support: ‘I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop’. Customer: ‘OK’. Tech Support: ‘Did you get a pop-up menu?’. Customer:… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
I love to read those advice columns in the newspaper. I read one this morning. It said, "What’s the worst thing a wife can get on her twenty fifth wedding anniversary?" "Morning Sickness." Paddy asks Murphy "Murphy, why do scuba divers fall off their boats backwards?" Says Murphy " You bloody pillock paddy, if they… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
So many Swine Flu jokes already…. The swine flu pundemic SYMPTOMS: Look out for any unusual blemishes or rashers. Unusual behaviour: doing things you would normally find a complete boar. Bad temper: things start to easily rind you up. Overheating: Feeling that you are absolutely bacon hot. Chills: Feeling like you need to hog the… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole. The ball hit one of the men. He immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony. The woman… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
It was a sunny Saturday morning on the course and he was beginning his pre-shot routine, visualizing his upcoming shot, when a voice came over the clubhouse loudspeaker: “Would the gentleman on the woman’s tee please back up to the men’s tee!!” Our man was still deep in his routine, seemingly impervious to the interruption.… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
I became confused when I heard these terms with reference to the word ‘service’. Internal Revenue ‘Service’ Postal ‘Service’ Telephone ‘Service’ Cable ‘Service’ Civil ‘Service’ Customer ‘Service’ State, City & County Public ‘Service’ This is not what I thought ‘service’ meant. But today, I overheard two farmers talking, and one of them said he had… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
Diane’s story about the Chinese calligraphy on her sweater reminded me of the T-shirt which I purchased from a clothes chain. I thought it very smart with Chinese characters across the front, cinched in at the waist, except that when I walked through Melbourne’s Chinatown I noticed folk looking at me with a little smile… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
A father found his small son looking very unhappy. "What’s wrong?" he asked. The boy said, "I can’t get along with your wife." One day, a New Zealander on holiday in London walked into a curio shop. Looking around, he notices a life-sized bronze sculpture of a cat in a dark corner. The sculpture is… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies