A middle-aged man asked the Trainer in the gym:"IF I wanted to impress that beautiful girl, which machine should I use?"The Trainer smiling replies:" The ATM machine outside the gym…" "Give a man a fish and you feed him for the day.Teach him to use the Net and he won’t bother you for weeks."
Category: Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
Fabulous Friday Funnies
Taken from a question and answer style internal news story following the Canterbury earthquake in February. “Two chaps were walking towards me down Hereford street in the direct aftermath of the earthquake. One of them looked devastated, and his mate was consoling him with the words “You’ll just have to get used to it, she’s… Continue reading Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
Did you know that a recent study shows that 6 out of the 7 dwarfs are not happy Sky news report. The USA have intensified their attack on Libya.They sent in another 3 ships – 2 full of sand and one full of cement..it was a mortar attack.
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
I was driving around and around a packed parking garage in search of an available space. Nothing. Then I noticed a couple walking ahead of me. "Going out?" I called to them hopefully. "No," said the man. "Just friends."
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
Two snakes were crawling along when one snake asked the other, "Are we poisonous snakes?" The other replied, "You’re darn right we’re poisonous! We’re rattlesnakes. Why do you ask?" To which the first replied, "Because I just bit my tongue."
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
A waitress became violently ill while at work and was rushed by ambulance to the emergency room. In typical hospital fashion, she was placed on an examining table and then all but ignored for the next half-hour. Finally, she noticed a doctor out in the hall and yelled, "Please help me!" "Sorry," he replied, "it’s… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
I was out walking with my 4-year-old daughter. She picked up something off of the ground and started to put it in her mouth.I took the item away from her and I asked her not to do that.‘Why?’ my daughter asked.‘Because it’s been on the ground; you don’t know where it’s been, it’s dirty, And… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
"Watching your daughter being collected by her date feels like handing over a million dollar Stradivarius to a gorilla."—Jim Bishop "Scientists have developed a car that can run on water. The only problem is that the water has to come from the
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
An excited army recruit asked his Company Commander for immediate leave as his wife was going to have a baby. Permission was granted, and when the leave pass had been issued and the soldier was leaving, the officer asked exactly when the baby was due. "About nine months after I get home sir", replied the… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
The Fabulous Friday Funnies
"Miami was voted the worst road rage city. You have 20-year- olds doing 95, and 95-year-olds doing 20, that’s why."-Craig Ferguson The first time I met my wife, she was an intense aerobics instructor at my health club and I was an out-of-shape new member. After one grueling workout, I gasped, "This is really helping… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies