Getting back together with an old boyfriend is pathetic. It’s like having a garage sale and buying your own stuff back. I always find that the first 5 days after the weekend are the hardest So good as this bar is,” said the Scotsman, “I still prefer the pubs back home. In Glasgow there’s a… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
In an alcohol factory the regular taster died and the director started looking for a new one to hire. A drunkard with ragged, dirty look came to apply for the position. The director of the factory wondered how to send him away. They tested him.
Helping me sort clothes into "save" and "give away" piles, my six-year-old daughter came across a garter belt. "What’s this?" she asked. "It’s a garter belt," I said. Seeing that meant nothing to her, I added, "It’s for holding up stockings." "Ah," she said, carefully placing it in the "save" pile, "we’ll use it next… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
Wife asks husband, "How many women have you slept with?"Husband proudly replies, "Only you, Darling – With all the others, I was awake." "According to the ‘Wall Street Journal’, researchers at Harvard have found an enzyme in the brain that regulates obesity. They said if it wasn’t for our brains, we would all be thin.… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
Once upon a time in their marriage, my Dad did something really stupid. My Mom chewed him out for it. He apologized, they made up. However, from time to time, my mom mentions what he had done. "Honey," my Dad finally said one day, "why do you keep bringing that up? I thought your policy… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
My 8 year old daughter returned to school after a week off due to the earthquake. They were asked to share their stories of the morning of the earthquake. According to her classmate, also aged 8, her father ran out to rescue the dog and the cat leaving her in her bed – where she… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
”Working in customer service at Vision Australia, I received a call from a lady who said she had been diagnosed with something that sounded like ‘immaculate conception’,”writes Jane, of Enfield. ”After some discussion, we agreed that it was probably macular degeneration, a leading cause of vision loss for people aged over 75. After further discussion… Continue reading The Fabulous Friday Funnies
Mick walks into Paddy’s barn and catches him doing a sexy striptease to a large piece of red machinery. Mick says "What the hell are you doing Paddy?" Paddy replies "Well me and Mary haven’t been getting on lately and the therapist recommended that I do something sexy to a tractor."
On our way to Perth we dropped Toby off at the kennels (where he was born). Both Toby’s mum and dad live there and there was also another younger dog that looked exactly like Toby. Kris commented "That dog looks just like Toby" The owner replied "Yes, that’s Toby’s half-brother".
A guy is walking down the street with a case of beer under his arm. His friend stops him and asks, "Hey! Whatcha got that case of beer for?" "Well, I got it for my wife, you see?" the guys answers. "Wow," exclaims his friend, "Great trade.